Demonstrating compassion at a time of public mourning

Even amongst the most uncaring, seemingly emotionless, or self-centred individuals it’s hard to imagine the lack of one type of emotion – compassion.

There can’t be many people in the world who, at one point in their lives, don’t demonstrate acts of compassion – very often upon hearing sad news and the impact that news is having on others.

Compassion literally means “to suffer together.” Researchers concerned with studying human emotions and feelings define compassion as “the feeling that arises when you are confronted with another’s suffering and feel motivated to relieve that suffering.”

Although closely related, compassion differs from empathy.

Whilst empathy refers more generally to our ability to understand and feel the emotions of another person, compassion is when those feelings and thoughts drive a desire to help.

Compassion and Empathy are 2 of the 24 Strengths that are part of the @Strengthscope Psychometric that I often utilise with my clients.

A Strength is identified as “something that you have energy for”. We all have our own levels of energy for the various 24 Strengths and the tool enables you to identify your “Significant 7” out of these.

In today’s modern and sensitive world cynics often dismiss compassion as ‘touchy-feely’ or ‘irrational.’ However, scientists mapping the biological basis of compassion link it to a deep evolutionary purpose – showing that when we feel compassion, our heart rate slows down, we secrete the “bonding hormone” oxytocin, and parts of the brain linked to empathy create a natural desire to want to approach and care for other people.

So, what examples of compassion can we see around us in our everyday lives?

Well, the nation’s reaction to the death of Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II clearly demonstrates compassion.

Let’s return to the definition above and concentrate on the words ‘feel motivated to relieve that suffering.’

The sea of flower bouquets placed outside Buckingham Palace, Windsor Castle and Balmoral Castle; the thousands of heartfelt messages written in books of condolence across the UK; the length of the queue of well-wishers wanting to pay their respects – reaching at it’s peak 24 hours and six miles – and the lines of people on the pavements, often up to seven or eight deep, show how the British public were motivated to play their part in relieving the Royal Families suffering.

Photo Aida Batres

And what was particularly inspirational was the fact that these signs of compassion came from people up and down the country and from all walks of life. We all saw on the television well-wishers making comments like “I’ve never considered myself as a Royalist before but…..” or “I felt I just had to come for the sake of her children.”

Again, all these people motivated for their own personal reasons.

May I express my own personal condolences to the entire Royal Family at this time of extreme grief and sorrow.

Watch out for my next blog: “The importance of compassion in business.”

If you’d like to explore the subject of compassion more deeply, please contact me via Email: russell@theresiliencecoach.co.uk.